Disobedience Problem

If you know me, you know I am not a reader. I have never loved to read and have always found it to be quite a struggle to make it through a book, at least in a decent amount of time. However, this has never stopped me from buying lots of books with all the good intentions in the world to read them,

This past August, I moved into a new apartment and realized that I no longer had a bookshelf that was big enough to hold all the books I had. The thought of buying a new one briefly crossed my mind, but when I looked around my little space, it was quite evident that there wasn't going to be room for me to put one. So my box labeled "book shelf" was taped back up, and shoved in the corner beside my washer and dryer.

This year, I have been trying to be a better reader, so I decided this past week that it was time to get the old book shelf box out and find one of my go-to books to start again and hopefully finish this time.

When I opened the box, I found so many books that I forgot I packed away. Along with these books were journals upon journals filled with heart-felt prayers, Bible studies, sermon notes, and even some middle school-ish journal entries recapping different things.

In one journal, there was an entry that really captured my attention and honestly rocked me to my core. It  was written on December 29, 2015 from my favorite place, Gatlinburg, Tennessee, when I was only 18 years old.

"God, I see you. I see every opportunity you put in front of me to share your love and your gospel with others. It's not that I have a communication problem, it's that I have a disobedience problem. Help me to be bold and without timidity. Help me to declare your name loudly to all the nations. Let me reside in full surrender with nothing holding me back. Nothing I will lose in serving you and being your disciple will be a loss. I can only gain from being a woman with audacious faith. Bring us revival and let it start with me."

It's not that I have a communication problem, it's that I have a disobedience problem....wow. I didn't realize 18 year old Amy had that kind of wisdom.

We live in a time where we have unending opportunities to preach the gospel, yet we don't for fear of being rejected, ridiculed, mocked, and the list goes on and on.

Recently, I have been working through the book of Acts. Acts highlights some of the first missionary journeys. In Acts 5, the apostles appeared before the Sanhedrin to be questioned by the high priest for preaching the gospel in the temple courts of Jerusalem.

The Sanhedrin told the apostles that they had ordered them "not to teach in this name," (v. 28) but the apostles replied, "We must obey God rather than human beings." (v. 29) The Sanhedrin grew frustrated and wanted to kill them, but a Pharisee named Gamaliel convinced them not to by saying,

"For if their purpose or activity is of human origin, it will fail. But if it is from God, you will not be able to stop these men; you will only find yourselves fighting against God." (v. 38b-39 NIV)

The speech convinced the Sanhedrin not to kill the apostles, and they beat them and sent them on their way. The next couple verses are what really convict me.

"The apostles left the Sanhedrin, rejoicing because they had been counted worthy of suffering disgrace for the Name. Day after day, in the temple courts and from house to house, they never stopped teaching and proclaiming the good news that Jesus is the Messiah." (v. 41-42 NIV)

The apostles were literally beaten and whipped for proclaiming the name of Jesus, yet they never stopped teaching and proclaiming the name of Jesus. Yet here I am, concerned about what people will think of me or how they will respond if I share the gospel with them.

Let me tell you some hard news. They gospel will offend people. The gospel convicts and brings out the bad in people. Nobody wants to see how bad they are. Nobody wants to know what they are doing wrong. BUT, the good news of Jesus and his mercy, forgiveness, and grace far surpass our nasty sin. Jesus' work on the cross was far more uncomfortable than the discomfort we could ever feel from sharing the gospel with those around us.

I have never heard a quote I hate more than, "Preach the gospel and if necessary, use words." Your actions are simply evidence that what you say about Jesus is real and true. However, nobody will ever come to the knowledge of Jesus' saving grace and what He did for us on the cross just by you having "good" actions or living a "good" life. Open your mouth! Speak the gospel! Share the good news!!

Christians, we are called to share the gospel with all nations. We are called to be a light so that salvation may reach to the ends of the earth. It starts with obedience.

We do not have a fear problem. We do not have a "lack of people to talk to" problem. We do not have a lack of knowledge problem. We do not have a communication problem. We have a disobedience problem. Not sharing the gospel is disobedience. That is all there is to it.

I encourage you and pray that you will seek obedience today. Who is God calling you to share with? God's purpose will never fail. (Acts 5:38)