Charge

It’s currently 5:30 am as I am writing this and I’ve been wide awake since 4:30. Today my fellow teammates are kicking off the first week of camp in Kenya and I’m not there yet. I cannot get them off my mind and I’ve been crying out in prayer over them and all the kids arriving today all morning. 

One thing I ask myself very often when I pray is, “what’s your word?” I strongly believe that part of having true and deep intimacy with God is being aware of what He is doing in your life. Asking myself what my “word” is, is simply just taking the question, “what is God teaching me?” and simplifying it to just one single word. This really pushes me to truly think hard and meditate on what God is doing in my heart.

This morning, my word is “charge.” As I have been lying here, my heart and mind keep going back to last summer on a night we referred to as, “cross talk.” This was a night where we took time to explicitly share the gospel in detail. As I walked in to worship my first week, I felt the Lord speaking to me, “charge, my girl.” It is a battle to reach lost souls. Sometimes battles seem scary and leave us feeling defeated before we have even walked in. But good news, friends. We may be batting, but the victory is already won in Christ Jesus. Charge. Take heart. March in with full confidence in your Savior. Share boldly. Share proudly. The gospel of Jesus deserves to be proclaimed in full confidence and assurance of the victory we have in Him. 

For the LORD your God is the one who goes with you to fight for you against your enemies to give you victory.-Deuteronomy 20:4

Charge is also a good word when it comes to taking care of our spirit. I’m sitting here charging my phone and thinking about what it means. (I’m studying journalism, so I tend to think in metaphors quite often. Haha) Last night as I was heading to bed, my phone was on 88%. I unplugged it from the charger and headed off to sleep. When I woke up at 4 am, not too many hours later, I was on 33%. Besides the fact that I might need a new phone, this reminded me of a lesson God taught me years ago. The second you unplug a phone from the charger, it starts dying. The battery slowly drains as the phone works to surf social media, Google answers, play music, and whatever else. In the same way, the second we step away from God’s Word, our spiritual “batteries” slowly start to drain. The more we pour out, the quicker our “battery life” goes. The good news is, we don’t have to stay on 0%, 33%, 88%, or even 99%. We have access to a recharge from Jesus through prayer and His word. In order to be an effective tool, we must learn to utilize these “chargers.” Not only that, but we must learn to love and cherish them-His word and open communication we have with Him through prayer. 

And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him.-Hebrews 11:6

You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.-Jeremiah 29:13

                                    

                        

Camp Counselor Pro Tips

Last summer, I was a camp counselor at the best camp in the world - Camp BlueSky in Nairobi, Kenya. I fell in love with all things camp. The ministry, the fun, the competitions. But I especially fell in love with my kids. As I have been preparing for summer #2 with BlueSky, I have been thinking back on things I learned last summer about children's ministry in a camp context, and how to be a successful counselor. Here are some of my "pro" tips...

1. Relationships first-ALWAYS

When my girls are arriving and settling into camp, I make it my mission to give them the best first impression as possible. The first few minutes in the cabin are crucial when it comes to trust and respect. If the first thing they remember is a counselor fussing at them and being pushy, they will likely develop a disrespectful and resentful attitude. However, if you make them feel at home and just be their friend, things change. They listen to you, they care what you say, they respect your authority, and it just makes for a better week. One way I do this is by getting to know my campers. If they tell me their favorite song, I will sing it to them and dance like an idiot. If they tell me their favorite movie, we will talk about the plot. If they tell me about their family, I ask questions and show them pictures of mine. Being personal is always a good idea.

2. Give your undivided attention when possible

This is basically just reiterating my last point because again...relationships matter!! This one can be hard. When you are outnumbered 7 to1 or more, it is so easy to let your campers be just a number or just one of many. Campers' sense of belonging can radically impact the way they feel about their overall camp experience. So what are some practical ways to give undivided attention in a context where your attention can so easily be divided? Sit by a different child every meal and check in on their day, ask each of them what activity they enjoyed best, or sit and chat with them in the cabin while everyone else plays a game. One of my very favorite things I did last summer was what I referred to as "bedtime buddies." (Bonus tip: That's a totally lame and uncool title for pre-teens and teens, so don't let them know that's what you are calling it-lol.) During this time, I would walk around and sit by each campers' bed and have a  one-on-one conversation. I would ask them their favorite and least favorite part of the day, if they were having any conflicts, and what they learned. I had 4 goals with this: 1. let them know they are loved 2. try to resolve any conflicts and 3. send them to bed thinking of the day in a positive light (bedtime is when we often get caught up in negative emotions because we actually have time to sit and think) and 4. try to get their mind back on the Gospel-what is Jesus teaching me right now? Some of my most intimate conversations happened during this time.

3. It matters most at 3 am

One last tip along the relationship lines because I really, really just can't harp on it enough. I will be the first to say...I LOVE sleep. It is honestly so easy to get annoyed when you are up with a camper in the middle of the night but I promise this is when it matters most. Camp is literally 24 hour a day ministry. I had an instance last summer where a camper woke me up at 3 am because she was homesick. This was such a special time because I was able to sit with her, talk with her, and pray with her while the rest of the girls were sleeping. In another case, I had a girl wake me up around 2 am because she accidentally wet the bed. She was mortified and had tears streaming down her face. I assured her that everything was okay and I would take care of it. I let her sit down while I changed the sheets and got rid of the old ones. At the end of the week, she came to me before she left and thanked me for dealing with the incident privately, calming her down, and making sure everything was taking care of. A whole week of fun and that was the one thing she remembered. I truly believe that her entire experience would have been drastically different had I let my sleepiness drive me to anger and frustration.

4. If it needs to be done fast-make it a competition

There were so many times where I needed my campers to accomplish things quickly. Unfortunately, "fast" is not always in the vocabulary of young girls, and even if it is, they most definitely would not pair "fast" and "effective" together in a sentence. One thing I found that truly saved the day was making things that not only needed to been done in a timely way, but also done in the correct way a competition. If there was a prize on the line, my girls would almost always do what I asked of them. One of my biggest accomplishments last summer (and I am only half-way kidding) was getting 9 girls to shower in 25 minutes with only 2 showers. I had them start outside their bedroom door and once they tagged my hand, I started the stopwatch. They would run to the bathroom, shower, put their pajamas on, and run back to tag my hand. It was actually a really fun time that really built up the atmosphere in the cabin because you know...relationships. (Disclaimer: if you use this technique, be sure your kids understand that it only counts as a shower if they use soap. I was shocked that I even had to have this conversation.)

Ok, time for some more serious tips.

5. Pray and pray often

On the first day of camp, before my campers ever arrived, I always walked around to every bed, laid my hands on it, and prayed for the child that would be sleeping there. Before I even knew the name and the face that would occupy the space, they were prayed for. I prayed for Biblical understanding, safety, fun times, and strong relationships and I prayed against homesickness, fear, anxiety, bullying, distractions, and any other schemes of the enemy. It was imperative for me that I started my weeks like this and I made sure that this time of prayer was given the top priority on my list of things to accomplish for before my girls arrived. I also dedicated a day to prayer walk all around our campus before the camp sessions began. That day will forever be in my mind as one of the most special and significant days of my life. The Lord spoke so clearly to me that day and really prepared me for what was ahead. It was also important to me to pray throughout the day. If we were coming up on a Bible study time, I made sure I was praying for attention and understanding. If I could tell one of my girls was struggling, I would pray for that. 1 Thessalonians 5:17 instructs us to "pray without ceasing" and camp was where I truly learned and embraced the meaning and value of that scripture. The enemy fights hard, so we must fight harder.

6. You can never give enough grace

There is not a single instance from last summer that I look back on and think, "wow, I should have been a lot tougher on that kid." However, I can look back on a few and think, "I could've been a little bit more gracious or a little bit more patient." You will absolutely get tired. Camp is exhausting and kids have a crazy amount of energy. The campers are only there for a week, and you are probably there for a couple of months. But we have to give grace as freely as the Father has given it to us. They will not be perfect, and they may even drive you crazy at times. But how do we ultimately point people towards the Father? Imitate the Father. (Ephesians 5:1) Love like He did. Be gentle, be gracious, show mercy and compassion. We will never win souls for Christ if we live lives that are contrary to the gospel and His character.

Honestly, I could talk about camp all day long. I could think of tons of advice to give and tips to make things easier. But really all you need to remember is to value relationships, love like Jesus loved, let loose, and have the time of your life serving the One who gave His life for you.

Camp BlueSky, I am so ready for you.

Even Jesus Rested

Today I left three things unfinished on my daily to-do list...THREE!!

It was not until last semester that I discovered the benefits of having a daily to-do list. Before then, I relied on my memory to complete tasks and spent much more time napping or just laying in bed than I did being productive. Now, with classes getting busier, I obsess over my to-do list. One of my friends wrote, "Tell Trey he is cool" on it and I did it just for the pure satisfaction of marking it off. I keep myself so busy that I find myself in class while doing homework for another class, finishing assignments on my phone as I walk to my car, or staying up into early morning hours. While keeping a to-do list has kept me more on top of things and helped me keep my stress level to a minimum, I have become so consumed with crossing things off a list and being productive that I have neglected to give myself time to just be and to sit and rest.

This week God has placed a truth in my heart that I have not been able to shake. It is a constant thought and one I simply cannot push aside no matter how hard I try.

Even Jesus rested.

Let's look at one of my favorite stories from Mark 4.

35 That day when evening came, he said to his disciples, “Let us go over to the other side.” 36 Leaving the crowd behind, they took him along, just as he was, in the boat. There were also other boats with him. 37 A furious squall came up, and the waves broke over the boat, so that it was nearly swamped. 38 Jesus was in the stern, sleeping on a cushion. The disciples woke him and said to him, “Teacher, don’t you care if we drown?”

39 He got up, rebuked the wind and said to the waves, “Quiet! Be still!” Then the wind died down and it was completely calm.

40 He said to his disciples, “Why are you so afraid? Do you still have no faith?”

I think Jesus probably left a lot on his "to-do" list that day. (Of course Jesus was perfect and so obviously He did what He was supposed to but just follow me for a second.) There were still more lessons that could have been taught. There were probably people who still needed healing and probably people with hungry tummies. But still, Jesus knew that He needed time to go and rest. 

Notice too that Jesus did not just stop to rest when it was convenient. He literally rested in the middle of a storm. A time of rest might not always be convenient, but it will always be necessary. It is also important to note that even Christian fellowship is not a replacement for rest in Christ. Jesus was with his disciples. He could have sat and talked, socialized, or played a game of Phase 10, but instead He chose alone time in the stern. I try to always remind myself there is a difference in good things and God things. We might seem to be doing everything right. We are with good Christian company, involved in a church and in a ministry, pouring into others, but yet we still have everything wrong. Without time to rest in Christ, we are unable to gain the Spiritual energy we need in order to live and love like Jesus did.

So today I didn't finish my to-do list. Instead, I took a nap with my dog, I took some time to fellowship with friends, and most importantly I spent some extra time in the Word and didn't rush so I could move to the next task. I rested.

Eugene Peterson says, "Busyness is an illness of the spirit." Let's pray for healing from this illness and restoration from Jesus, our source of rest.

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest."-Matthew 11:28

-Amy

10,000 Reasons

November 18, 2014. An exciting time in my life. 3 days before, my team had won our first state championship, Thanksgiving was only a little over a week away, Christmas was quickly approaching, and life was good. All of those things came to a halt around 3 am when my mom woke me up and informed me that we had to get to the hospital because my sweet Aunt Marsha was not expected to make it through the day.

I got in the car and I remember feeling numb. What emotions was I supposed to be feeling? What was I going to see when I got to the hospital? How different would life be at the end of the day? So many questions, but not a single answer. I plugged in my headphones and shuffled my worship playlist on my phone. I will never forget the first song that played on my phone. 10,000 Reasons. 

Whatever may pass and whatever lies before me, let me be singing when the evening comes.

Those lyrics were different then than they had ever been before. This time I actually was not sure what the lied before me. I was not sure if I would want to be singing when the evening came. But even still I could say, Bless the Lord oh my soul. 

When we arrived at the hospital, we walked in the room to find my family members all very solemn, a very rare sight for the Lowe family. We spent the day standing around my aunt's bed with worship music playing. Together we sang song after song, and even as we were watching her condition worsen, there was a peace that filled the room, and truly we were singing when the evening came.


And on that day when my strength is failing, the end draws near and my time has come, still my soul will sing Your praise unending, 10,000 years and then forever more.

Shortly before my aunt lost consciousness, one of my family members was sitting beside her and noticed that she seemed to be whispering. When she moved closer to hear what she was saying, she realized she was trying to sing. "His Grace is Enough" was slowly coming from her lips. On this earth, she was a worshipper, but I can only imagine what it must have been like to enter into Heaven with a song of praise that will never end for all eternity. Truly His grace is enough for us.

That day, 10,000 Reasons became so real to me because I realized that even at the end of our darkest days, we can still find joy and hope in singing praises to our Creator. And even when our strength is literally failing and time has come to only minutes, God is still worthy to be worshipped, and He is still good.

Heaven is so real, and eternity is so much closer than we could ever imagine. While we await that day, I pray that we would be worshippers on this earth that never cease to bring praise to the One who is worthy, even if it is with our final breath.

But it is we who will bless the Lord from this time forth and forevermore. Praise the Lord!-Psalm 115:18

-Amy

Worth It || Kenya-Summer 2018

"Worth it."

   This was the very first thought that popped into my head as the wheels of flight 1588 touched the ground in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. Exactly 141 days before, I was sitting in a hotel room in New York City, reluctantly putting in an application for summer missions overseas. This came as a response to a small group I attended where we walked through Psalm 90 and focused in on verse 12 which says, "Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom." With a heavy heart, I wrote myself a note in my Bible that said, "Don't waste your life, kid."

   I can say very confidently, this summer was not a waste. At debrief, I was asked to summarize my whole summer in one sentence. To me, this seemed impossible. 8 weeks in one sentence? No way. But as I thought back over each and every person I met, only one sentence came to mind.

   One night, I was woken up at 3 am to one of my girls crying very loudly. I walked over to her bed and asked her what was wrong. She replied, "I am just very homesick." I spent the next 15 minutes calming her down and praying over her. The next day, I messaged my parents and told them how much I saw myself in her. 10 years ago, I was a very different person. I struggled with extreme separation anxiety, and rarely left home. At one point, I decided to go to summer camp, but spent every night crying while my counselor sat beside my bed and did her best to comfort me. If you would have told me then that 10 years later the roles would be reversed and I would be doing the same thing for one of my campers 8,200 miles away from home, I would have said you were crazy. But God is so faithful to take our circumstances, grow us, and use us as part of His perfect plan for His glory. When I told my parents this story, my dad replied, "God can literally use anybody." And that sentence can easily summarize my whole summer.

   When my team arrived back at Camp BlueSky after 2 weeks of traveling, (check out my Tune My Heart blog for more on that) I settled into my new home and spent a few days preparing for my first cabin. That week, I was assigned to 9 Satima girls which are 10 and 11 year olds. As each one arrived at camp, they each brought something special. Sass, kindness, humor, intelligence, and energy just to name a few. It did not take me very long to find myself loving each one of them deeply, but one girl in particular stole my heart. Let's just call her Katie for now.  From the moment Katie walked into Cottage F, I knew she was something special.

   Every night as I sent my girls to bed, I would take a few minutes to go around to each one of them one on one and ask them about their day. I referred to this time as "bedtime buddies." The second night, as I got to Katie's bed, I asked her what she had learned that day. She responded, "I learned that Jesus loves me and He is real." She continued to tell me that she comes from an atheist home, and she did not want to be like her parents. "I really like Christianity," she told me. I was so encouraged by this conversation, and could hardly wait to continue pouring into her the rest of the week.

   Every Wednesday night at BlueSky, we have "cross talk." The kids are consistently exposed to the gospel multiple times every day at camp, but Wednesday night is the night we explicitly explain it and walk through the scriptures of Jesus' death and resurrection. When we finish, we take all the campers out to an open field and let them lay down under the stars and spend some time thinking and praying about the things they feel the Lord speaking to them. As my girls were laying there, my co-counselor and I (shoutout to Kirsten, what a champ!) walked around and spent a few minutes with each of our girls individually. When we got to Katie, we sat down and asked her what was on her mind. She replied, "I am just confused." When I asked her what she was confused about, she replied, "Not Jesus, I know He is real." My heart almost exploded. Kirsten and I continued to ask her questions and after a few minutes, she told us that she wanted to accept Jesus into her heart. Praise God!

   Later that night, Kirsten and I got to give Katie her very first Bible. We wrote her a couple notes with prayers and encouragement, and the smile that came across her face was a smile I will never forget. The next night, as we sat down for our cabin devotion time, we got on the topic of creation. I was about to start walking through the story when Katie quickly spoke up. "Let me tell them!! I read it today." Without hesitation, Katie walked the cabin through the whole story of creation, almost word for word. She told me that she had spent her whole rest time reading through Genesis. What a blessing to see a child so passionate about the Word and sharing it with others, even when she had only been a Christian for a day.

   The next week, I moved down to the Suswa age group. I had 8 girls ages 7-9, and I was blessed with another wonderful co-counselor that week. (*claps for Hannah*) When my girls started arriving in the cabin, I could tell it was going to be another wonderful week, but it was also evident that the week would come with many challenges. One of my girls, let's call her Sally, came in and very quickly announced, "I am not religious!" We continued on with our day, and I did my best to point every one of my girls to Jesus in every situation. That night, as we sat down for our cabin rewind/devotion time, Sally saw my Bible in front of me, and questioned, "Is that a Bible?!?!" I replied and told her it was, and again repeated, "I am not religious!!" I explained to her that we were at a Christian camp so we would be reading it anyways. When I got to Sally during bedtime buddies, I asked her what she had learned and she said, "Well, I will tell you this...next summer I am coming back, but I am going to make sure to bring a Bible because tonight I learned how important it is." I explained to her that she did not have to wait a whole year and that I could give her a Bible the very next day, and that is exactly what I did.

   From the moment Hannah and I gave Sally her Bible, she would not put it down. She read during rest time, during dinner, and at bedtime. She read for so long that we had to practically force her to go to sleep. How incredible is it that less than 24 hours after she had announced that she was "not religious," she was reading her Bible constantly?! Only Jesus.

   Wednesday night as we were getting ready for cross talk, I was so excited to see how Sally would respond. I could hardly wait to sit with her and see where she was at. As our conversation went longer and longer, it just seemed as if Sally was getting more and more confused about who Jesus is and what He has done for us. I walked into the conversation so confident, yet walked away so discouraged. I had to remind myself that it is never me that saves people. Jesus is the only one who has the power to save, and it is only our job to be a tool in His tool belt and be faithful to share with those He puts in our path. Everything in me was saying to give up on her, but the Lord reminded me that if He has not given up on her, neither should I. We continued to pour into Sally the rest of the week, and had so many people praying for her.

   Friday morning, I had the incredible opportunity to speak at Jr. Camp Empower. This was a time where the two youngest age groups, boys and girls, came together for a morning worship time. Thursday night, I hardly slept. I spent a while sitting on my porch walking through the scripture I was going to share and taking notes. When I finally got in bed to try to sleep, I woke up several times during the night and just could not rest. I even had a dream that I got up to speak and forgot everything I was supposed to share. Every time I would wake up, I would pray that the Lord would give me the words to say.
   When I got to breakfast the next morning, I went up to one of BlueSky's amazing leaders, and asked her to pray for me. I told her about my restless night and how I was not sure why, but I was incredibly nervous to speak. She looked at me and said, "Something good is about to happen." About an hour later, I spoke about Simon Peter and how he denied Jesus 3 times. When Jesus was resurrected, He reinstated Simon Peter by asking Him 3 times, "Simon Peter, do you love me?" The next night, Sally came up to me during a prayer time and she said to me, "Amy, tonight I heard a voice in my head. The voice said, 'Sally, do you love me?' and I told the voice yes." I then explained to her that it wasn't just a voice that she heard in her head, it was Jesus. I asked her if she believed Jesus was real, and that everything she had been reading in her Bible was true. It was like she turned into a preacher. She started stomping back and forth and exclaiming things about Jesus and His character. "Nobody else could do what Your God does!" Sally then asked Jesus into her heart. What a blessing!

   There is so much I could tell you about people God chose to use this summer and the way He revealed Himself to me and strengthened my faith. We could talk about perspective, about growth, about all the amazing things BlueSky has to offer, about how many kids we saw come to faith in Christ this summer, and so much more. But here is the gist of everything I could tell you...do not be afraid to follow the Lord and pursue the callings He places over your life. He can literally use anybody, even you. He can use your brokenness, He can use your doubt, He can use you mess-ups, your discouragements, your highs, and your lows. And I can promise you this...it will be worth it. Every. Single. Time. He is so so faithful, and He will never stop pursuing us.

   If you would like to know more about all the incredible things the Lord did this summer, please do not hesitate to message me. I could talk for hours!!

   Thank you so much to each and every one of you that supported me both financially and in prayer. Your encouragement and support meant the world, and I could not have made it through the summer without you all. I cannot wait to share the next adventure the Lord takes me on, and as I said last year when I returned home from NYC,

Until everyone sees.
Until everyone hears.
Until everyone knows.
Send me.

-Amy
 

Tune My Heart

   The concert is beginning in 15 minutes. The director stands in front of the band and prepares them for what is to come...the big performance. But first, he takes a moment to have each player tune their instrument. A push here, a pull, a twist there, and the instrument is ready to make beautiful music. Without that proper alignment beforehand, the concert would be a little flat and a little less beautiful.

   Two weeks ago, I sat down in the floor for a time of worship with 20 new faces. As we were about to begin, the worship leader got up and moved to a separate room, urging us to spend a moment in prayer while he tuned his guitar. I asked God, "Lord what does it mean to be tuned?"

   I think it is absolutely amazing how God prepares us before hand for the things we will experience. Much like the band director, he meets us face to face and refines our hearts and renews our spirits. This tuning isn't always comfortable. Sometimes it requires a push, a pull, a twist. Sometimes we have to let go of things, or be thrown into situations that we do not understand. But in the end, as we take a deep breath and breathe into the instruments God has given us, all the refining comes out in a beautiful song. A song that magnifies and glorifies the Lord. A song that makes His name known among the nations.

   I saw the way the Lord tuned my heart a week ago to prepare me for the days to come. As I was walking to a local school in a village I was visiting, I was greeted by a sweet 6th grade girl named Belinda. We walked and talked for hours. It started with all the small talk imaginable. From favorite colors, to siblings, to hobbies, and everything in between. When Belinda told me she loved to read, I asked her if she had a Bible to read. (She attended a Christian school, so I was assuming that she at least had one.) When I asked her this, she smiled and said, "Yes, I read it every day and every night." She shared with me her favorite Bible verse in both Swahili and English. Philippians 4:4 says, "Rejoice in the Lord always, I will say it again: Rejoice!" For a girl that had so little, she knew exactly where her joy came from. This was so humbling to me, as it is so easy sometimes to fall into self pity and begin to lose sight of the joy I have in Jesus. Yet someone who seemingly has so much less than me still finds reasons to rejoice in the Lord in every single situation.

   Belinda's thoughts on Philippians 4:4 continued to convict me and burden my heart. A few days later in worship, one of my leaders shared a passage of scripture. It came from none other passage than Philippians 4. Paul writes in verses 11-13, "I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength." This passage is so much more than a passage to be tattooed on our arms, or quoted as we strive to pass a big exam. This is about being in deep physical need. We can conquer these things because we have Christ on our side and in our hearts.

   Reading and meditating on Philippians 4 tuned my heart and prepared me for the next stop on our village ministry journey. We arrived in a village called Sirwa. Sirwa is a village in the mountains and is absolutely gorgeous. When we arrived at the home we were staying at, I was so convicted seeing the way in which these people live, yet still have so much joy. Their bathroom was nothing but a hole in the ground, their beds a simple mattress pad on the floor, and their meals humble. My heart ached for them, and for the rest of the people in the village seeing how little they had. We spent the next few days living life the way they did. I was not always comfortable, sometimes my tummy felt a little hungry, and my legs ached after walking hours just to get to destinations. But through it all, I gained a better understanding of what Paul was saying, as he faced times of plenty and times of need, learning to be content and joyful through it all. I am aware that my situation was nothing compared to Paul's, but I am so thankful for the way the Lord used Philippians 4 to prepare me and the way he used Sirwa to give me a better understanding of scripture.

   When we let the Lord tune us, He draws us closer to Him and reveals more of Himself to us. By letting God pull, twist, and push on my heart, my eyes and heart have been opened to the things He is calling me to. It was not an easy tuning and sometimes it hurt, but now as I get ready for the "performance" ahead, the performance of sharing the gospel with those who have never heard, I am fully confident that it will be all the more beautiful because of the way I allowed the Director to spend time tuning me.

   In this time of learning to be tuned by God and in tune with His spirit, I have found a new creed for my life. Here is how it goes:

   I am part of the fellowship of the unashamed. I have Holy Spirit power. The die has been cast. I have stepped over the line. The decision has been made. I am a disciple of His. I will not look back, let up, slow down, back away, or be still. 
  My past is redeemed, my present makes sense, my future is secure. I am finished and done with low living, sight-walking, small planning, smooth knees, colorless dreams, tamed visions, mundane talking, cheap living and dwarfed goals.
   I no longer need pre-eminence, prosperity, position, promotion, plaudits, or popularity. I don't have to be right, first, tops, recognized, praised, regarded, or rewarded. I now live by faith, lean on His presence, walk by patience, lift by prayer, and labor by power.
   My face is set, my gait is fast, my goal is heaven, my road is narrow, my way rough, my companions few, my guide reliable, my mission clear. I cannot be bought, compromised, detoured, lured away, turned back, deluded, or delayed. I will not flinch in the face or sacrifice, hesitate in the face of adversary, negotiate at the table of the enemy, ponder in the pool of popularity, or meander in the maze of mediocrity.
   I won't give up, shut up, or let up, until I have stayed up, stored up, prayed up, paid up, preached up for the cause of Christ. I am a disciple of Jesus. I must go until He comes, give till I drop, preach till all know, and work till He stops me. And when He comes for His own, He will have no problem recognizing me. My banner will be clear.

   Lord, thank you for discomfort. Thank you for showing me that I have been blessed with so much, so that I may pour out to others. Humble me and help me to constantly rejoice and be content in all circumstances. Help me to never resist the fine-tuning of my heart, so that I may be in tune with you, and share you in a more beautiful way. Thank you for being the Director of my life, that always knows where I need a push, pull, or tug.
Amen.

-Amy

NYC Spring Break Missions Trip

After returning home from GenSend in New York City this past summer, there was no doubt in my mind that I wanted to get back to the city as soon as possible. During my spring break, I was blessed with the opportunity to get to do that at Mosaic Baptist Church with 10 incredible people from Troy University’s Baptist Campus Ministries (BCM) and WOW, let me tell you. It was absolutely incredible. The week before the trip, I knew this was going to be something big. I am a firm believer that when the enemy sees the potential in someone or something like a mission trip, he does everything in his power to shut it down. The week before the trip was the hardest week I have had since being in college and possibly even the hardest week I have ever had. I was dealing with the death of my dog (which in comparison to many other things is not a bid deal, but she was my pal and it was still hard), a couple very personal hardships and relationships, and the death of my grandfather. During this time, I found myself praying many times that God would find me faithful in the midst of these trials, even when it didn’t make sense and when I all I really wanted to do was drive home and be with my family. I knew that in order to be faithful to the Lord’s prompting, it was time to pack up and get ready to go back to New York.

We left very early on Friday morning and took a bus to Atlanta to catch our flight to NYC. Several people on our team had never flown so it was super cool to get to experience their first flight with them. We arrived in New York City that afternoon and braved the metro system with all our luggage. We arrived at our hotel and got settled in and then took a subway downtown for dinner. After we finished eating, we took a quick trip to Brooklyn Bridge Park to see the Manhattan skyline. When we came out of the subway, I caught a glimpse of my favorite view in the whole world and my heart felt at home. The night was insanely cold and we definitely were not dressed warm enough, so we cut our time short and headed back to the hotel to prepare for the next day.

We got up early the next morning and headed to Meme’s, a local coffee shop, to meet Pastor Stephen and do a quick orientation before getting to work. When we finished our coffee, we packed up and walked across the street to a theater called “The Black Lady Theater.” Mosaic Baptist Church was hosting a parenting conference there that day consisting of speakers on subjects ranging from nutrition, to helping your child with homework, to Biblical parenting and everything in between. Before the conference, our team helped set up the room, put together gift bags for the families, and greet guests as they arrived. Once the conference started, our team was in charge of child care. Let me set this scene for you…we were in a small square room. We had 6 or 7 kids and 11 adults in that space, the room was empty, and the only thing we had to entertain the kids was a Bluetooth speaker, a few crayons, and one coloring sheet. There was not a lot to work with, and we had to get super creative in order to keep the kids occupied for 5 hours. Thankfully, there were many people on our team who are very passionate for children’s ministry and handled the task like champs. For the first little bit, we played duck-duck-goose, London bridges, ring-a-round-the-rosie, and just ran in very small circles a couple times. (Why do kids like doing that???) When the adults were nice and out of breath, we sat down for a time of Bible Study. We walked through the resurrection of Jesus and how he was not in the tomb when the women arrived there. On a whim, our team started acting out the story as it was read to the children, and they were so engaged and attentive. In the curriculum we were teaching from, it said to have the kids play hide and seek and then relate it to Jesus coming out from being “hidden.” Hide and go seek in a small empty room sounded impossible, but we gave it a shot anyways. I was shocked, but it turned out to be a huge success. We would let the kids hide behind us, under our jackets, or under a sheet that was found in the room and they went along with it and acted like it was the hardest game of hide and seek they had ever played! The game ended up lasting 30-45 minutes or so. After the kids had lunch, we ended the day with some more games and hooked up one of our teammates laptops and watched a few episodes of Veggie Tales. We sent the kids home nice and tired, (you’re welcome, parents) and helped the church pack everything up.

After leaving the theater, we went back to the hotel for a much-needed time of rest. That evening, we headed to Times Square for a night of exploring. We walked around as a group for a little bit, and then the guys split off to go get New York Pizza and the girls headed to treat ourselves to a nice meal at Planet Hollywood.

Sunday morning, we got to sleep in for a little bit, and then we got ready and walked to Brower Park. On our way, we stopped in Kennedy’s restaurant (I believe that is what it was called) for lunch. We got our food to go, and ate it in the park. The plan was to go prayer walking with Pastor Stephen and for him to give us an orientation to the community and the neighborhood before heading to church. However, our plans had to change when we got a call that Pastor Stephen had to catch a flight to Atlanta to be with his family as his father was expected to pass away. I was very proud of my teammates and how they remained flexible as we reworked our plans. We decided to head back to our hotel for a time of prayer for Pastor Stephen and his family and a Bible Study. After this, we headed to the church to help set up for service. Mosaic does not have their own building, so each week they must come in, take everything down that is not theirs, set up all their equipment and prepare for service. During service, we walked through Psalm 90 and discussed the mortality of man and making our day’s count. It was an awesome service, and it was incredibly encouraging to see how the members of the church came together in a time of hardship, and filled in for Pastor Stephen. As the service was coming to a close, we had a time of prayer for Pastor Stephen’s family and for other members of the church who were dealing with different hardships. It was an incredibly special time for everyone in attendance. After church, we caught the subway and headed to Chinatown and Little Italy for dinner. Half of the team ate at an authentic Chinese restaurant, and then the other half of us ate at an authentic Italian restaurant called Puglia. It was incredibly delicious! When we finished dinner, we met back up as a team and went to the Staten Island Ferry. We rode the ferry and enjoyed the awesome view of The Statue of Liberty and Manhattan.

Monday morning came quickly and we got up and walked to Dunkin Donuts to meet Salome, who was kind enough to step in and fill Pastor Stephen’s role in leading our team. We bought two large things of coffee and then walked to her apartment where there was a second mission team waiting to do orientation with us and then do ministry with us. After hearing from Salome all about the community of Crown Heights and what to expect for the day, we hit the streets with coffee, hot chocolate, invitation cards to the church and hearts ready to share the good news of Jesus. We understood the challenges of ministry in a fast-paced city but we were more than ready to give it our all. We gave out many cups of hot chocolate and coffee as well as the invitation cards to the church. We also got to have several meaningful conversations with people. I personally got to talk to a man named Roy. Roy had never even heard the name Jesus before which was both shocking, as well as heartbreaking to me. It was an honor for me to be the first person to ever share the gospel with him. He was a little bit confused and did not understand how the things I was sharing with him could be true. He expressed that he was lonely and looking for companionship. I shared Mosaic’s information with him and let him know that there are many people there who will love him and be a friend to him, but we believe Jesus is the ultimate companion and friend. We continued having awesome conversations with people throughout the day as we continued to serve. Later in the day, a sweet old lady came walking by with tears in her eyes. I offered her the coffee and hot chocolate but quickly realized she needed something more than that. I asked her if she was okay and if I could help her in any way. She told me she was looking for a doctor and could not find it. She handed me his card, and I pulled up his office on my phone. It ended up only being about a block away so I offered to walk her there. On the way, we shared many laughs and got to have a nice conversation together. When we got to the doctor’s office, I asked her name and if I could pray for her. Her name was Miss Carmen. She did not want me to pray for her at the time, but I still pray for her, and I hope you will too. Through this experience, I learned the importance of meeting people’s needs. If we meet tangible needs of others, they will be more open to hear what we have to say and will willingly trust us. Our actions should be a picture of Jesus as we prepare to verbalize what he has done for us. After lunch, we went on a prayer walk around the community. It was crazy to see how going just one street over could completely change the dynamic of the community. It was definitely evident that Crown Heights is dealing with a lot of racial and economic division and it made our team realize just how desperately these people need the gospel and the unity that Christ brings.

God definitely used us as His vessel on Monday, and we got to share the gospel with several people and plant seeds with dozens of others. When we were done with ministry for the day, we decided to stay in for the night and rest. Later on, we walked a couple blocks down and the majority of the team had dinner at an authentic Mexican restaurant called Chavela’s while the rest of us opted for coffee and smoothies at Duncan Donuts. The rest was much needed and the bonding time was a great way to prepare for our next two days of ministry.

Tuesday morning, we got up and braved the snow and made our way back to Salome’s apartment to get our instructions for the day. (Side note, every member of Mosaic was always so welcoming and willing to have us in their homes. Such wonderful people.) Tuesday was going to be a lot like Monday in that we would be serving coffee and hot chocolate and trying to start gospel conversations. However, this time we would only spend a few hours on Nostrand (the street we were on the day before) and then we would move to Franklin Avenue. Franklin avenue is the hipster side of Crown Heights. Everything is very fancy and pricy. Franklin is also the gentrified area of town. The proper definition of gentrification is the process of renovating and improving a house or district so that it conforms to middle-class taste. Basically, what is happening is middle class people are coming in to take advantage of low housing rates. This in turn raises the prices of housing and displaces lower class people. Because of this, there is a lot of tension in the community and in this area. The people on Franklin are typically not as open to have conversations and are not as friendly as residents in other areas of Crown Heights. We were nervous and skeptical as we made our way to Franklin, but we were willing to follow the Holy Spirit’s prompting and open to speak as we felt led. That day was very hard. The snow kept a lot of people inside for the day, and our location made things harder. However, we were still able to have several conversations with people and invite them to church. It was hard not to feel a little bit discouraged as we left, but we know that God can multiply our efforts and continue to stir the hearts of the people we came in contact with.

Tuesday night, we had the wonderful opportunity to join in with one of Mosaic’s small groups. We had dinner together and then sat down for a time of Bible study. That night, we worked our way through Psalm 90 once again. As we were reading, one verse really fell heavily on my heart. In verse 12 it says, “Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom.” In life, it is so easy to live looking forward to the next “thing.” In the fall, I am waiting for Thanksgiving and Christmas, in the spring I am looking forward to summer. I seem to always be counting down and waiting for something. But what about all the days between? How many opportunities am I missing out on to point people to Jesus because I am waiting for another day? What if I don’t make it to that day? What if the number of my days is only one? I need to learn to just live for today. I need to learn to see each day as a big day simply because His mercies are new every morning (Lamentations 3:22-23) and I have the opportunity to live for Christ and to be His vessel. In my Bible, I wrote myself a quick note. “Don’t waste your life, kid.” I pray that I would see each and every day as a gift and that I would daily seek opportunities to know my Jesus more, and to make Him known to others. Our time together that night was the sweetest time we had together the whole week. Such an encouragement and challenge.

Wednesday was gardening day. Since people in New York City all live in apartments and do not have their own land, parks are essential to them. Brower Park is a special place for the residents of Crown Heights. By meeting tangible needs in the park, and serving the people by handling the gardening and grounds keeping, people begin to trust us and respect us. This led to opportunities to tell people that we were serving as part of Mosaic, but ultimately to point them to Jesus and the gospel. That day we moved mulch and spread it around the trees, turned the compost pile, and helped clean out the butterfly garden in preparation for the monarchs to return when spring comes. As we were working, we met people who were walking around in the park, as well as some people who were skateboarding and playing basketball. We got to have conversations with several of them and invite them to church. We were also joined by Jasmine, who is now a member of the church, but was invited by a missions team like us while she was there playing basketball. It was such an encouragement to have her there, knowing that the effort we were putting in was not pointless. The gardener’s name was Miss Robin. She is not a Christian, but she has a great relationship with several members of Mosaic, including Pastor Stephen. She has even participated in several events put on by the church. Our prayer is that by helping Miss Robin with her responsibilities, we will exemplify the love of Christ and one day she will know Him personally. It was a very physically demanding and tiring day, but it was awesome to have the opportunity to meet the needs of the community. 

Wednesday evening, we headed to downtown Brooklyn and walked the Brooklyn Bridge. We walked somewhere between 1/4 and 1/3 of the bridge, and then turned around to go back to the metro station. We hopped on the subway, and went a couple stops down to Juniors Restaurant. We enjoyed some delicious Juniors cheesecake, and then took a walk down to DUMBO for a gorgeous view of the Manhattan skyline and a peaceful waterfront park. I truly believe that spot is only of the prettiest places on earth.

The next day was our off day and we spent it exploring Manhattan. In a few hours’ time, we saw the 911 Memorial, Trinity Church, the Wall Street Charging Bull, Grand Central Station, Macy’s, the Empire State Building, and Grand Central Park. We enjoyed just being all together and growing closer to one another. Even though we were technically not doing ministry that day, we went with the understanding that we are to live our lives on a mission, number our days, and not waste any opportunities. Because of this mindset, we still had a few conversations with people we met. After exploring, we headed back to the hotel to pack up our things and spend some quality time as a team. It was sad to pack up, but also very encouraging knowing that we had come, holding back nothing, and put all we had into serving the community of Crown Heights and New York City as a whole.

Friday morning, it was sadly time to leave. While it may have been the end of that trip, I firmly believe it was not the end of my time in New York City, and it was definitely not the end of ministry for any of us. I am so thankful that I did not give in to the hardships I was experiencing the week before the trip and make a decision to stay home. God used that week to teach me, mold me, and grow me in incredible ways.

3 weeks after our trip, Mosaic had their Easter Sunday service. While we were there doing our coffee and hot chocolate ministry, we handed out invites to this service. We got an update from Salome that they had 10 visitors in attendance that Sunday as well as a few visitors who had come in the previous weeks. What a blessing and answer to prayer! Please continue to pray for Pastor Stephen and his family, Miss Robin, Miss Carmen, Roy, and Mosaic Baptist as they continue to serve their community and faithfully share the gospel with them.

“Here I am, send me!” Today, tomorrow, and every day. Let’s live our lives on a mission for Jesus!

-Amy